I am already dead.
In some future place, some unknown time, in some way no man can accurately predict, I am dead.
So are you.
How does it feel?
Irrespective of the tragedy we endure, or see on the computer screen, or watch our neighbors go through, these tumultuous times have given us a gift. And it’s one that might not be easily seen, or, better yet perceived.
And that is the hard knowledge that at some moment, of some day, of one week, of one month, in some year, we will be dead.
We’ve spent our entire lives, I’d say, running from the prospect of death. Doing things more healthily, strapping ourselves in tight to moving vehicles, reading labels, and pounding down the doors of evil, polluting corporations because it all might be killing us.
But we forget – we’re already dead. Somewhere, sometime. In ways we can’t outrun, outprotest, outchange.
Would you like some good news now?
You’re alive.
Right now. In this moment. You’re alive.
And you’re free. YOU ARE FREE. To do what brings you joy. To live the gorgeous, comical, wonderful, confusing life you live. To cast away the labels and the standards our culture has set, to shed the belief systems that keep you subservient to material possessions and the act of obtaining them.
To be perfect. Just the way you are. Because YOU ARE.
Nothing – and I’ve read eighty-bazillion different religious texts, spiritual books, and self-help tomes – NOTHING has made me feel better than the moment, two months ago, when I realized I was already dead.
NOTHING has given me more permission to feel the joy in every moment, every moment I am alive. To pursue ONLY things that nourish joy.
When I’ve put together precious herbs and oils that have worked so hard to be effective to serve me, when I give deep and full respect to those plants and rocks and the exquisite life that brought them to my kitchen, I feel implicit joy.
When I walk past the lilac bushes in the park and catch a floating, fleeting whiff, when I cut open a vanilla pod and lick the wayward seeds off my finger – I feel implicit joy.
When I write this blog, even on days when I think I’m too tired or uninspired, I feel implicit joy. And when I receive comments and emails that are full of intimate stories, questions, and ultimately victorious revelations , I feel implicit joy.
On any given day now, I feel implicit joy a hundred times or more.
Because I know there’s nothing to worry about. Why worry? I’m already dead.
Why do things that don’t bring me implicit joy? Time is too short. Life is too precious. Days are too numbered.
When you realize your mortality – your humanity – and accept it as inevitable, the chains of tomorrow are lifted. Maybe not completely (although with time and practice, I think we can get there).
I must confess, there are moments where I forget all of this and lose the infinite freedom of these realizations. There are times where I’ll spill coffee and receive a cross phone call and ultimately blow everything into a proportion as big as cataclysmic, species-ending meteor.
But then I remember. Time is short. Find the joy. Even in the crazy. ESPECIALLY in the crazy.
So think about it.
What if tomorrow is your last day here? What are you going to do with today that brings you implicit joy?
This weekend, I encourage you to seek out those things. Whatever they are. Maybe they’re picking spring wildflowers with your children. Maybe they’re creating a 3-hour decadent, luxurious, and relaxing spa time just for you.
Maybe it’s creme brulee. Maybe it’s a spinach and strawberry salad. Maybe it’s even a bag of Funyuns. Or a hike to a waterfall. Or a handwritten letter to a friend. Or a smile at a stranger. Or a puppy licking your face. Or just laying in bed for an extra hour in the morning. (Or every single one of these things.)
Whatever it is. Feel it. Feel that joy – the kind that starts in your stomach and radiates through your heart until it pours out as laughter from your mouth and tears from your eyes.
FEEL IT.
Because today …
You.
Are.
Alive.
Isn’t that fantastic?
—
My dearest readers, I want to write more things like this. I feel so many things like this. But I also want to give you what you’re here for. I gave a halfhearted try doing this at my other offshoot blog, but honestly, I can’t find the time to give the attention to both the way I’d like. So I’m asking you, would you be opposed to a Friday Food For Your Soul post every week? So I can fulfill all of my expressive needs in one place?
If you hate this, it’s okay, I can take it. Just tell me “no” in the comments.
But, if you’re on board and willing to let me explore all these enlightenment-type ideas (and, goodness knows, I have a million of ’em), don’t even bother to tell me yes. Instead, leave a comment about something – anything – that brings you joy.
This post. It’s about joy. It’s not about death. It’s about LIVING.
So let’s make the comments all chock full of it.
EVEN (and especially) if what brings you joy is the smell of your 3-year-old’s feet.
Make Your Own Heavenly Homemade Vanilla and Peppermint Extracts
Hey Betty! I just found your blog this past weekend 8/27/11 and am reading backwards which brings me to this 4/29 post. I love your Food for the Soul posts that I’ve read! Every single one of them reminds me of lessons I learned when I took a course with Landmark Education. Have you heard of them? Have you taken any of their courses? If not, then you would absolutely love them. They are right up your alley! I’m not trying to advertise for them, although I would in a heart beat, because they are the kind of Food for your Soul that you are talking about here in your blog. I’m not sure where you are writing from, Landmark (www.landmarkeducation.com) is a world wide company, so there is a good chance there is a location near you. Anyway, I would love to know if you’ve heard from them. I would love an email back. I love your blog and I love your Food for the Soul posts along with your recipe for natural products. I love your wit and information. Keep up the good works!
I know this sounds weird, but I really love the smell of my dogs breath. Its not that icky bad dog breath, its sort of sweet and comforting. Also, this might sound backwards as well, but I really relish the moments after my boyfriend and I get into a big fight (usually over something really petty, that doesn’t matter, because you’re right about death!)Those moments when we realize how silly we were and make up. I fall in love with him all over again 🙂
I just wanted to say, I just started reading your blog because of all the cool natural recipes that you have, but this post just made my day. Very inspiring, and I think we can all agree that a little reminder of positivity is just what we readers want!
Thank you for writing this beautiful article.
Thank you for reminding me that I need to find joy in my life. I would consider it a blessing to read a post like this every week.
Oh, I feel such a connection to the WHOLE when I read things like this! YES! Just BE!
The sun on my face, and the sand under my feet. Its my favorite moment of joy, even though it is so simple. Loved this post, and can’t wait for more.
Harvesting fresh veg for meals, instead of going to the grocery store gives me this joy.
Dried apple slices from my local farmers market that just re-opened for the summer!
Harry Potter! (hah!)
The smell of apple cider vinegar conditioner!
This blog!
Talking politics with my dad!
Watching America’s Funniest Home Videos with my sister (we laugh until we cry)
Reading!
Dancing!
Posts about living life to the fullest!
This blog is so great. I wish I found it sooner. You’ve got such a great outlook and it is contagious. Thank you thank you!
This morning I woke up to blood all over my kitchen and my roommate with an artery blown open. It was a mess. The dog was panicking, my other roommate (his fiancé) was panicking, and so was I. We called the paramedics and followed instructions (applying pressure to the wound and wrapping in a towel). Really, in hindsight, I’m sure I knew everything would be okay.
They’re fine and waiting at the hospital. They called back to let me know the situation as I had to stay here to make sure the rent was paid to the retail associate coming today. The wound is sealed, though they have a six hour wait for stitches. There was also the issue of how they would get home as we have no car. But despite all that they were laughing about it. We talked about the times we all helped each other out and how we wouldn’t have gotten through so much without each other.
Anyway. While they were gone I popped onto their computer and just happened to glance through their favourites to find this blog. I’m glad I did. This combined with what I went through today is a nice reminder that regardless of everything, of anything, implicit joy, the joy you can get from anything or anyone random, is great. It’s funny because I think everyone knows this, but it gets so muddled amongst everything else. Searching for meaning is meaningless, or maybe meaning itself is without meaning. Either way as the existentialists say being is living and living is being.
I’ve been doing henna tattoos for a long time now but have been afraid to do as much as I like on myself due to worries about not being given a chance by people. It’s nice to sort of re-realize the freedom I’ve always had. I`ve got a batch of paste frozen in the fridge that I might just use tonight. Thanks for the inspiring post – stay crunchy.
– – Also I apologize if the beginning seemed a bit graphic. I just felt like sharing the events that brought me here.
I’m going to bother with telling you… yes! Please continue to explore and fulfill and express! That would give me joy.
Other things that have lately given me earthly joy? Yesterday morning I sat on my front step with a cup of tea while 4 peacocks (peahens, actually) foraged in my half-finished messy front yard. In the afternoon I saw a group of Cedar Waxwings eating berries off of the overgrown awful ivy on the back fence. They reminded me about putting things into perspective, that I can choose what to focus on, and that with the bad there’s always good… and if I only open my eyes to it… there’s joy.
Now I’m going to go bake some bread… (another joy!)
Please, please, please keep writing, Betty. I needed this so much. I had an interview with a prospective housekeeping client yesterday, and I was about to take the job, but your post made me realize that, if I don’t absolutley need the money, why the heck would I want to do something that I doesn’t bring me joy?! Life isn’t all about making money, and you can’t take it with you. So I thank you, dear, for enlightening all of us. And I look forward to more “Food for Your Soul” Fridays! Thanks again.
I needed this today. I’ve been in a funk lately and only looking at the negatives. But you’re right. Life is too short to take things so stoically. Joy is the chocolate cake of life – and who doesn’t want chocolate cake??
Some things that brought me joy today:
-FINALLY trying your No-Nonsense Daily Scrub. It is truly amazing and my skin was so soft and glowing afterward. I can’t believe it took me so long to try it. It filled me with giddy joy that I will (probably) never use regular soap on my face again!
-The tickle of a honey mask dripping down my face and licking the drips!
-Stepping on the scale and seeing that all my hard work on my treadmill the last 3 weeks is paying off. 7 pounds down – woot!!!
-My 2-year-old son just having a blast playing outside in the water. Usually I get uptight about this because I hate changing his clothes after he gets soaked. But today it filled me with so much joy that he was filled with joy!
Sadly, there were a lot more negative feelings than positive today. And after reading this and reflecting on my day, I feel kind of bad and guilty that I let myself get so upset over these things. Why did they really matter? I wish I could rewind today and do it over with a better outlook. But tomorrow is a new day. You’ve inspired me to try keep a positive lookout in life and find joy wherever I can. Thank you.
Slaughterhouse 5 reference? Love this, by the way.
Keep it coming! We don’t get our nourishment solely from food.
DON’T. STOP. PLEASE.
and thank you…I really, REALLY needed to hear this today.
THANK YOU! <3
Um please keep ’em comin! That was wonderful, especially since I haven’t had the best day today. More please, yes!
Ok you know someday we will have to meet face to face. I can’t believe how timely and good this all is.
Finding joy in the little or big things in our lives is so important. I get so much satisfaction from watching my little Willie put his head out the window to smell the fresh air when we drive to work in the morning. He’s my profile pic. Isn’t he darling? I call that photo “the cupcake shot” as in he looks good enough to eat.
I’ve been gardening with my Mom and Dad this season and we just harvested these big beautiful zucchinis. They were enormous. I’ve been having it for dinner and it’s fantastic. There is a lot about this that I love. I get to partake in fresh good food and I get to spend time with my parents and bond with them over something we share in common which is a love of gardening and good food.
Back at the holidays, I watched a movie called, Dan In Real Life. Anyone seen it? It kind of changed my life. It’s about a widower spending time with his daughters and extended family and the drama that ensues. The dad’s character was so humble and loving, it just blew me away. He wanted to make the best decisions he could for his family and he approached every situation from a place of love. The movie served as a catalyst for me, and I’ve been making my family more important and central to my life as a result.
We really don’t know how much time we have in this life. Someone close to me is recovering from a major medical scare right now. And over the years, his health has been a constant reminder of how fragile life is. I’ve taken that to heart by trying to appreciate the moments we have now. And I’m trying…..to approach my interactions with the people in my life from a loving place even if they may not. It’s hard, so maybe that’s why we have to practice at it. (I’m practicing with a situation right now actually)
I can also truly say that this blog has become an integral outlet for me. I came here looking for recipes and blog ideas and now it’s feels like I’ve found some sort of community that I can express myself in and be heard and learn so much from all of you too.
Cheerio! (Say that in a British accent today please 🙂
Whatever you write, it all goes *up.* That’s why I love you so. (And wouldn’t have you any other way.)
Oh, you asked about our joy! That I’m on *this side* of things… every day that I get to be here for my daughter as she grows up, I’m grateful.
I don’t remember where I read “my life is an embarrassment of riches” but I do remember feeling like I’d just had some good food for my soul.
Food for my face, food more soul, you give me the pure stuff. And I love the way you serve it up. Sluuuurp! xxoo
I think your post is beautiful, and I think you should do whatever brings you joy. Having said that, I would absolutely read a weekly Food for the Soul post. Joyfully.
Betty, once again, you rock. Write posts like this once a week or everyday and I’ll still keep coming back.
My three-year old just licked my face and is running around in her underwear. Oh, the joy!
First of all, I love you. I was so in need of something like this today. THANK YOU.
Second: irony, or Divine Intervention? Yesterday I printed off a ice cream base recipe and bought a new ice cream machine on a whim. My mint and roses are in full bloom, and I plan to make some Mint & Rose ice cream sometime this weekend. Baking and making new things bring me such joy, I wish there was more time in the day, so I could do more of it.
I also had a moment last week. I guess you could call it spiritual, or maybe just self-lifting.
I was hanging out with one of my cousins and they were cooking eggs for breakfast, and I snagged a bite off of their plate, and it was really good, and I said “Wow, this is really great!”, and she kind of gave me a funny look, and I said, “What?” and she replied with, “Well, of course it’s great, you’re the one who taught me to cook, Nessa.”
The moment that you realize that you, in some way, contributed to an individual’s own personality/life-style/skills/whathaveyou, is by far, the most fascinating and humbling feeling.
~Ness
Count me in as another “yes, please!” vote for more soul food posts!
I love it. It made me smile and feel good. Keep em coming. My joy comes from the things my kids say! They are hilarious!
Betty, right now I’m sitting on my recliner, enjoying a cup of green tea, after kicking out the cat for peeing on my just washed kitchen rug! But he does bring me joy when sitting on my lap, kneading and drooling. Yes, please do post more Food For The Soul Fridays. Just “Stumbled Upon” your site and will be trying your homemade deodorants soon. Just started planting some strawberries and chocolate mint, have to start peppers. My first attempts at this but I know, success or failure, that it’ll bring me joy to try it.
This post was exactly what I needed to hear this morning! I have been tired of living this life of a normal, responsible (I mean BORING!) adult for awhile now but have been too scared to do anything about it. Reading this reminded me that I can do, and SHOULD do, anything that makes me happy. So I’m off to make some plans for my new wonderful life! Thank you for writing this. You have brought me joy today! Please do continue these “Food for Your Soul Fridays”. You never know who’s reading & who needs to hear what you have to say!
Yes! I know you said we don’t need to say so, but yes, yes! I’ve been reading many a blog post lately that has hit a chord in me (and it’s making some lovely music!), this being the most recent. It’s all inspiring me to make a change for the better in my life, because, right now, sitting in a hum-drum office building, I am not living or feeling implicit joy. And life IS too short. So, despite the fear that comes with it (or perhaps because of the fear – I’m only this scared because this matters to me so much) I am going to take action. All that to say I would love to read more food for my soul every Friday! My face and soul are both very hungry!
And there is something about the smell of garlic and oil cooking that just washes over me and always puts me in a joyful and warm mindspace. I just feel good all over!
It’s not death that worries me, it’s dying. So I want to make the DYING part as far from painful as possible. That’s why (part of why, really) I am (slowly, steadily) moving toward more natural, more home-made, less toxic, products and foods.
And I am all for enlightenment posts, whether here or on your other blog, I check them both. They always seem to come at a time when I need them. It’s funny how life works that way, giving you what you need, when you need it.
No. I don’t object. I also won’t unsubscribe. Everyone needs and have the right to have an outlet for the soul. But for me personally it’s Christ that gives me assurance that I’m alive and will continue be alive after my body perish. And yes, my 2 year old daughter’s feet smells deliciously!!!!
Freedom makes me happy. I want a life full of experiences. It makes me happy when I’m fully participating in my life.
I’m going to the beach and plan on appreciating every grain of sand and every breeze. Being in or near water makes me feel so alive!
Betty~I found your blog last night and loved all the recipes!
Your post today is profound~absolutely the best thing I’ve read on living life and understanding that every drop of joy we can extract from it is our true purpose. I haven’t read as many books as you~I think I’m only at 25%, but I, too, never learned as much from them as from just reading today’s post!
My joy? Doing spring cleaning and finding bits and pieces of my adult children’s lives tucked away in this box and that tote. Cards, small presents, art work…you name it. They all make me so filled with joy.
Thanks for reminding us of the real rules of life!
May your weekend be filled with more joy than you know what to do with,
Tina
Perhaps in 3 years and 6 weeks, it’ll be the smell of my 3-year-old’s feet. 🙂 For today, it’s the way she uses them to do her uterine gymnastics that keep me up at night. And the way she kicks “hello” when her dad comes home from work.
Bring it on Betty. Food for the soul is as important as food on the face! 🙂